I have had one continuous text message conversation since December. A never-ending conversation with Patrick from Pac’s Pad. Sure it pauses for awhile while jobs, relationships, and sleep gets in the way, when our hands don’t have steering wheels or chicken wings in them the conversation continues.
The latest turn has been about people liking you. The need to be liked to be more specific. I can very easily fall into the behavior ofwanting needing everyone to like me. No, affirming me. Like Lisa Simpson jumping up and down begging for someone to grade her.
“Affirm me, grade me! I’m ever so good.”
I don’t kid myself that writing to you everyday isn’t part of this, yet it is also the counterweight. I’ve started taking a quick photo of myself right after waking up, walking the dog and pouring coffee. No shower, no comb. It’s a simple way to explain to myself WYSIWYG, What You See Is What You Get. Well, that’s the theory anyway.
The latest turn has been about people liking you. The need to be liked to be more specific. I can very easily fall into the behavior of
“Affirm me, grade me! I’m ever so good.”
I don’t kid myself that writing to you everyday isn’t part of this, yet it is also the counterweight. I’ve started taking a quick photo of myself right after waking up, walking the dog and pouring coffee. No shower, no comb. It’s a simple way to explain to myself WYSIWYG, What You See Is What You Get. Well, that’s the theory anyway.
WYSIWYG looks pretty darn fine to me! But aren't you concerned that you will get bored constantly taking pics of yourself wearing a shirt?
ReplyDeleteThere are so many other possibilities, shirtless, in undies, without undies, going into the shower, coming out of the shower.... Stevie, please expand your horizons a bit!
I like you.
ReplyDeleteI hear you. You know, we keep pushing ourselves to be better, to know better, so that we can stop NEEDING (wanting) the affirmation but our cyber-worlds bring us back to this ludicrous mindset. After all, we are the only ones who can truly affirm ourselves. Surely, when someone points something positive in us, we are elated, often times thinking that we are FINALLY good enough, but we forget that in that moment we believe in us because we are conditioned to only believe in ourselves through others' perceptions of us.
ReplyDeleteAlas, you are scrumptious, delicious and a great treat for those of us who follow you, but remember, at the end of the day we do not matter in relation to your worth. You would still be just as amazing if you did not blog, if you did not post adorable pictures of yourself and even if you looked differently...just because YOU are YOU.
Best,
-S-