MORMON JELL-O

Last Wednesday I received a text from one of my sisters. Our Step-Mother had just passed away. The question then was if I’d go with the siblings to Boise, Idaho for the service. The family was assembling to be by his side.

I hadn’t interacted with my Father in…. six years. Maybe more. I texted back that I would go stay with my Father; to be with him as he buried his second wife. I responded yes without thinking of the past. Without any thought of the Mormon Church or the religious oppression attached to our relationship. This was a good sign.

The conversations and threats of Aversion Therapy, of realignment back to the core Mormon values by the use of ice baths and other insidious devices decreed by church elders are now nothing but decade’s old dust. The specter of a “straight” realignment had been exorcised.

If you’ve never been Boise, Idaho is a picturesque mountain city in Southern Idaho. The state has “Famous Potatoes” as their license plate slogan. It also has a Mormon Temple and a Starbucks on every corner. Like most western US cities is started as a Fort, and then grew into a farming community. The step-siblings I was introduced to at the service were all very nice and welcoming. Each person I met at the funeral went into explicit detail of what a great man my Father is and how the relationship with his wife made them the pillar of the church. It’s funny how people in your life can be complete strangers. I’m sure that goes for a Dad towards his son as well.

Even as I overheard someone ask him if I was married and his response was a short “No” I was unfazed. What others think of me is none of my business. I was unapologetic when telling my story:

I am the seventh child

I am the third son

I work in HR

I have one dog

I have a partner; he has a beard and drives a motorcycle.

I am an unbelievably happy and content individual.



The only down side the memorial service was the complete lack of Jell-O. What self-respecting Mormon Church has a funeral without Jell-O?