Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Thick Neck Steve


The last time I put on a work dress shirt was the end of May 2011.  My work dress code since then has been comic character T-shirts and gym shorts.  Washing and underwear was optional.  Now, I am returning to an office setting for a new job.  My days of working from home are done, and not a minute too soon. The gym shorts will only be good for the gym and the dress shirts will be coming out of the closet. Literally.

Yesterday I pulled every bit of work attire and completely reworked my closet. The dress shoes were under massive layers of Pumas, and I found the suit jackets and white shirts so far back I had to use a machete to get through the Structure polo shirt section. They were just hanging there in plastic dry-cleaning bags, thinking they were never to be worn again.

After trying on the ol’ work wear, I discovered two things: My waist is smaller, which is great, but my neck has gotten much larger in a years time. How the heck does someone lose weight everywhere, yet gain weight in their neck?  So, I’m a thick neck?

I now have an entire wardrobe of dress shirts that cannot be buttoned at the neck. This is kind of important, because I need to sport a tie.  They really need to make a dress shirt with a Sansabelt like option for the neck. Sans-a-collar?  Maybe I just need to go on a crash neck diet. I know that rushing out and getting liposuction in my neck may cost just as much as replacing all of my shirts. Until then, I will be the nicely dressed chap grabbing some lunch with some of the other gals from the typing pool whilst my head turns blue from lack of oxygen. 

10 comments:

Will J said...

Actually I think that the photo you used shows what you need. I don't recall what they are called, but it is a button and clip arrangement that attaches to the button and has an extender with a button end that holds the collar snug. Time to go down to a good men's habadasher and pick up a few. Like collar stays, you will have to remember to take them off when you do the laundry, but it might be an inexpensive way to get through until you get a few paychecks coming in.

Randy P. said...

As someone with a 24" neck... I find that if you tie your tie properly, you can always go without the top button fastened. But then again, this is silicon valley, I only wear ties for job interviews.

BosGuy said...

Good Luck Stevie B! My neck size grew after I started training - its actually from doing shoulder work outs. Maybe its the same for you. Either way it means you need to get yourself some new shirts.

Cheers,
BosGuy

Wonder Man said...

Well, it's an excuse to go shopping

Michael said...

Here's what you need: http://www.amazon.com/Wonder-Button-Collar-Expanders-Extender/dp/B0008172YS

StevieB said...

Ha! Funny that, that's what I bought.

Homer said...

I have to buy expensive tall shirts since my arms are way too long. I feel your pain.

Uncle Spike said...

Sans-a-collar. I love it. I would totally wear it...my neck size has also increased considerably over the past few years.

Christina said...

It's best to buy new shirt.

Christina @ Discount Suits

pingdevice said...

The man’s got it. Love the looks for summer.
Sean wears the clothes rather than them wearing him, it’s important to look at ease and comfortable, lived-in.
For anyone interested in prep style, I write a blog from a London, UK perspective. Lots of interviews and photography.
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