Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Waiting In The Concourse

The issue with dating again, if there is just one issue, is the complex dance of ritual required. These movements to attract just the right individual; this being a complete painfully long blog post of its own,  just to begin the hallowed and celebrated rites of gay mating.

First off, is the sorting of the guys pinging you on Grindr.  Are they coming in for a hard landing on the trick tarmac, or deplaning into the potential dateable concourse. That was a horrible analogy; let's forget I attempted to compare dating to air travel. But... they both require a whole body scan to look for foreign substances, and there's the joy of having your luggage searched by a stranger wearing rubber gloves. They both have very long lines, sometimes delayed for hours before take off. And, they both have the distinct possibility of falling from the sky in a mangled mass of bloody flesh and twisted steel.

Yet, my argument does hold merit. That a lot of energy is expelled in the messaging back and forth. On the positive side, I can easily sort out the around five-thousand guys who have the "NSA, right now" philosophy.  Not because I object with the philosophy, it's just that Daddy has stuff to do, and my day is too planned out to drop everything and meet up with a blonde with shows me his bunnywabbit pink anus.  As I write this, I have five hundred words due on the Arab-Byzantine wars, I don't have a free moment to bring Nasty home for a holiday. Also, I'm an old fashioned girl.

That being said, the planned outings are very nice. Getting a new shirt, freshening  up the haircut,  putting a new layer of Just For Men in the beard. And.... in case you're listening to other bloggers out of the streets, my beard looks completely natural when it's dyed. I asked my Mother and my Pastor, and out of anyone they wouldn't lie to me. With all that being said, I'm VERY new to the whole dating thing. The last "first date" I had, occurred on the same day that the first iPhone was launched,  June 29, 2007.  I am, and the world, is a different place in the years that have passed, We're on the verge of iPhone 6, and Steve 4S.  It doesn't help that the few guys I've had this strange "first date" experience with were seventeen when the iPhone launched. Yet, it seems they have been out on more dates.

It's a strange gay dating world out there in Denver, Co. Yet, I plan on diving into the dating pool.


anne marie in philly said...

it's the same in the str8 dating world. 23 years ago, I was dating; ugh; the bullshit steps one must go thru just to meet for a cock-a-tail. I don't envy you, dear.

Blobby said...

the first issue i see is that you're on Grindr. Why would you want someone that young.....I mean other than for obvious reasons.

They'd never get your cultural references.

Erik Rubright said...

They're probably all only Matt Smith fans, aren't they?