Friday, February 24, 2012

iDench 4S

You want to see Dame Judith Dench’s breasts? Sure, we all do…

As part of my literature class, this semester, we are deconstructing classic literary works. Yesterday we discussed Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream. As the group of nineteen year old girls that comprise the majority of this college course struggled to comprehend the classic, the professor decided to just play the movie.

Much to my happiness, it wasn’t the version with Calista Flockhart’s one grab at a movie career. The movie our Professor ordered up was the BBC’s 1968 version. I was excited because it featured a very young Diana Rigg as Helena. Secretly, I hoped she would just karate chop the hell out of some Athenian ass. It didn’t happen. Around the time that a young Judith Dench appeared I noticed that her perky breasts were bouncing around on screen. At this point I realized that I’ve never needed to see the boobs of James Bond’s boss.

Since I figured we were just watching the bouncy bosoms of a Dame for the benefit of the nineteen year old girls, I tuned out and mulled over my plan for an iPhone 4S. There comes a tipping point where your friends start to get better technology than you. I was more than content with my iPhone 4. Until, I received a call yesterday from the two friends stating that they are new parents of the latest version of the Apple phone. I realized that as much as I love my phone, a new and shiner one is out there for me to desire.

“The course of true love never did run smooth.”

I started to mull over the benefits to upgrading to the new version. Okay, there’s Siri. Do I really NEED to spend money to get a girl to talk to me? The other reason is the camera. Yes, it has three more megapixels than my iPhone camera, but every picture I’ve ever taken consists of me holding the camera in front of my face, in the bathroom mirror, showcases my t-shirt. Do I really need larger images?  Should I stay with my current phone and await the great iPhone 5 (which I hear will have a beverage dispenser) or upgrade.

Lord, what fools these iPhone zombies be.

As the class ended, I realized that I had daydreamed the whole class away pondering over a silly phone.  I also had eternally linked my lust for a new, shiny phone to the naked chest of Dame Judith Dench.












8 comments:

Erik Rubright said...

I'm trying to hold out for the 5. Granted, I have a 3Gs now. So it's a much needed upgrade.

As for the Dame's boobies. I don't know that I want to see those.

Pac said...

I was all set to make an insensitive joke about Retina Displays until it took me three tries to correctly make out the stupid captcha validation words to post it.

Karma really is a bitch.

Alexander said...

Fortunately my iPhone 4 will be available for upgrade about the time the 5 rolls out. Not that it has anything to do with YOUR quandary.

Gooster said...

I too am waiting for the 5 later this year. In HS we watched Macbeth, and I do believe it honestly was from Hustler. There was a lot of gratuitous boobage, which was just a waste on me!

Blobby said...

I think you owe Judi some sor of apology!

Dale W. said...

I have an iPhone 4. My quandry is how do I go about trading it in for a transmat.

cb said...

Plus, you KNOW iPhone 5 is like 6 months away. And then you'll regret just having the 4S.

BosGuy said...

Posting boobies Stevie? I was hoping to see Puck's backside.