Ahh, mid December. It’s time to gather around and listen to Uncle Steve’s annual Christmas rant…..
WHAT THE FUCK DO PENGUINS HAVE TO DO WITH CHRISTMAS!?!?
Have you seen the inflatable, glowing Christmas crap that everyone displays on their front lawns? Big billowing snowmen, elves, and happy penguins.
SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK DO PENGUINS HAVE TO DO WITH CHRISTMAS!?
At night it’s quite a cute little scene. A winter wonderland all blown up and bopping around to the forced air whooshing up their butts. But, during the day it’s another story. Driving through any upscale neighborhood it's a reenactment of Jim Jones goes to Christmas town. Dead, flat elves and snow people scatter the lawns like a mass suicide cult hit the North Pole. A massacre of merriment. One half-inflated penguin dragging its self off the lawn coughing out
“Don’t drink the Kristmas Kool-aide……..and I only live in Antarctica and parts of South America why am I even here?! Aaaaaaaaaghh!”
I feel bad for their ignorant cult joining asses as I drive by.