Tuesday, December 15, 2009

STOCKING STUFFER

“Can you call my phone?”

I hollered this up the stairs last Friday night. I couldn’t find my phone all day on Friday and was just recovering from cold sweats and the shakes. Not being connected to the interwebs for the day had taken its toll on me. I had been constantly scratching my left wrist while rocking back and forth. All the time wondering why my baby hadn’t gained any weight. Now it was time to look around the house. Again.

“Yes, just call it.” I snapped, wondering if Lassie had it this hard.

I turned and went to dig through the dog’s food bag, the only place that I hadn’t looked. Dragging my hand to the bottom of the bag I suddenly turned to the face the dog. He had a look of either guilt from stealing my phone or of confusion from me molesting his food. Then, the theme song to the TV show Dallas started to waft through the air; quiet at first then growing louder. I turned to the Shar-pei and he said, “That’s your phone!” As I turned to run towards the sound of my beloved. Halfway up the stairs the only sound louder than my ring tone was Fuzzy declaring;

“Oooh, what’s this!”

As I entered the bedroom the only person more crestfallen would have been Anna Karenina as she spied her lover being sent off to the front by a younger woman. There in Fuzzy’s left hand was my phone in his right was a huge box of fine chocolate. The chocolate I had purchased and hidden in the back of my underwear drawer for his Christmas stocking.

Last Thursday I bought a great box of his favorite chocolates excited to see him discover them in this stocking on Christmas morn. I guess I was so caught up in the guilt of hiding things when I placed my phone on the box and shoved the whole thing under my underwear. I then spent the next ten minutes trying to explain that NO, I did not hide the chocolate and phone as a romantic game.

“Sugar butt. Thanks for assuming that I’m that clever. You know me; I’m just not that smart." True.

7 comments:

Dead Robot said...

You should have bailed on the Chocos for Xmas idea and ran with the romantic game thing. Shabadoo! You could have gotten laid!

cb said...

And here I thought this was going to be the hubby being all romantic and getting you a new phone and surprising you this way!

Wonder Man said...

That's a cute story

Michael Rivers said...

Very cute!! Next time you will know and can turn it into a fun and sexy game!

SharkBoy said...

Sugar butt... ahaha
I'm steeling that one

Dyl said...

Great story :-)

buffguy said...

hahaha. should have played it off as romantic and what not.