Thursday, May 7, 2009

GOODBYE DINAH SHORE

I was sitting in the cubical yesterday trimming the fur that grows into my belly button. Personal grooming is important, especially when you’re a furry like me. Maybe using office scissors while at work wasn’t the best idea, but since everyone around me has been laid off, I could ride a scooter, naked with a penis pump and no one would see. If a Stevie uses a mantool pump and no one is around to hear, will it make a sucky-sucky noise?

As I’m trimming away, Dinah Shore the last Lesbos came into the 6X6 Steve lair. “I just got laid off.” She states. “You must survive! You’re the last remaining of the tribe. Tell our story, Steve! You must survive to tell the story of us!”

I love dramatic lesbians. But I hate that fact that I now have a private office, because the fifty cubicles around me are empty. Time for me to break out the scooter.

4 comments:

Gooster said...

A little sumptin sumptin to pump on your iPhone while you zoom around the cube farm! http://www.imeem.com/people/9xo9F8/music/J8aSlBg1/natasja-sucky-sucky/

Dead Robot said...

There's an image...

Hey maybe you should be making a hiding fort... they might be coming for you next!

The Mutant said...

I'm with DR, you need to rig the surrounding cubicle wasteland up with a series of booby-traps so that only you can get in and out!

I think naked scooterisingis this seasons new black - you HAVE to try it!

Mike "N" the Mechanics said...

Isn't there an iPhone APP for penis pumping, boobie traps and Job Hunting?