Friday, December 5, 2008


Two new Craig's list “missed connections”

Sexy Beast and the Black Hoodie - m4m (Mary's/Club M)
It was the night before THANKSGIVING . . .
It is quite sad that we should have to meet like this. I mean, we were ONLY ten feet away! Sure, all of that booty shakin' was makin' me sweat (hence the reason I put my BLACK, size SMALL, STUSSY hoodie on the chair with my scarf) But seriously, you could have just walked up and said, "Hey - NICE MOVES!" Instead you were a coward and moved in on my hoodie . . . Which had my RED SAMSUNG PHONE in the pocket! I do want to thank you for leaving the scarf though. It really kept me warm beneath my damp T-Shirt as I walked home that night - ALONE. Perhaps we could have walked home together? Guess now neither of us will ever know. If anyone knows the THIEVING MO-FO please tell him I desperately need my phone back! Keep the hoodie (with the buttons of a Monkey eating a banana & the Cow holding a gat - though they were my fav's) and please return the phone to Mary's -NO QUESTIONS ASKED.

Now, is this passive aggressiveness gone bitchy? Or did the guy like the creepy clepto? Is it just me or could you just picture the sad little Latino boy walking home alone, in the cold with only his sad scarf to keep him happy on Thanksgiving day. He needs a Snuggie.

Family Dollar on Broadway - m4m - 30
You checked me out today at Family Dollar - I was buying Christmas decorations for my office - my two crazy female assistants were with me - your name tag said "Fernando" you were cute, young, and hispanice. I was wearing a black sweater and black slacks... I would love to get you alone when things and people arent so crazy and get to know you... hope you find this!

Hi, I shop at the Family Dollar. I would like to tell everyone that I pickup guys who work at the Family Dollar. If this doesn’t work out, I’m going cruising at the DMV.


Dead Robot said...

You cuntbagel! I was going to do a post like this!


Kezza said...

Wait so cruising at the DMV isn't a good thing? Damn.

As for the first guy, it's a bloody Samsung phone, let it go man. You don't need it, it's only going to fail on you in the next week anyway.