Friday, August 14, 2009

CALL OF DUTY

I’ve completed my “Duty to Serve” for the great state of Colorado. Meaning I didn’t get picked for Jury Duty. Most likely it was based upon the fact that it was a domestic dispute and I have very strong opinions about people that think they can raise their hands to their partner.

I started having diarrhea of the mouth… more than usual. I started spewing phrases like “In this misogynist culture we need laws in place to protect citizens that have limited options. “ What the f*&K was that? I was excused. I did get in touch with my inner fag whilst filling out the juror questionnaire. It was very detailed:

What kind of music do you like?
Mostly dance and house with a leaning towards strong trance beats.

What do you do in your free time?
Make web videos with friends, blog, yoga, rugby, and collect comic books.

What do you watch on TV?
The History channel, News, Anything on the Sci Fi or the BBC America channels.

I wanted to gay bash me. I quickly realized that if this was a questionnaire for a dating service, my VHS tape would be on the bottom of the stack. I wanted to scribble in there "But I have huge Bi's & Tri's! At least I could add that I don’t beat on my partners, maybe that would get me some.

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