Friday, August 28, 2009


Boy, someone got the wrong house. Although I knew we would have to figure out who the lady of the house was eventually.

There is a no solicitation law in our neighborhood. Yet we get crap like this attached to our well appointed front door all the time. Maybe it’s because we have the only lawn that’s maintained and not strewn with children’s accessories. They see the house and think Wow, they must be newlyweds. The Little Lady would love some Avon.

What caught my eye was the “A Church For You” quote. I’m pretty sure that if I show up on their doorstep with this flyer and explain that my partner and I are butt pounding, lifetime fur loving, partner commitment companions that they may rethink if their church really is for us. Just saying.

So my butt pounding, lifetime fur loving, partner commitment companion and I have done everything to these door-to-door apostatizers and hockers of bad cosmetics.

“Honey, come here! You’ve got to see this, It’s little Mormon guys! I was a missionary when I was your age. Then I realized how much hypocrisy and hate the church spreads, soon I came to my senses and came out of the closet. Now I’ve never been happier.....I now have nineteen inch arms! See!”

Okay…. I didn’t say the arms thing….but I was in just my underwear when I spoke to them. Completely done up in Avon cosmetics. I guess we’ve answered the lady of the house question.


Anonymous said...

That it was ever a question surprises me.

Gooster said...

Too bad you weren't holding Tupperware while wearing a harness when you answered the door!

Anonymous said...

I kinda doubt that you are the Lady of the house...fc

Wonder Man said...

I love it, the arms comment is classic

Dead Robot said...

Those 19" arms... is that length?

SharkBoy said...

Where are the pictures???
I defo want to see that undies and Avon combo